Showing posts with label family dinners. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family dinners. Show all posts

Thursday, November 17, 2011

My Secret Weapon for a Happy Thanksgiving

Yesterday, both Grandad and Grams had the day off. We're still working on cleaning out closets and cabinets in anticipation of a big garage sale this weekend. We spent the morning running errands which included a drive to a credit union which is located on the other end of town about thirty miles from home. Fortunately, there's a Starbucks nearby which made the drive worthwhile. While riding around together, we used the time to discuss and firm up our plans for our Thanksgiving meal and the weekend.

My mother was not a great cook. I really hated a lot of the things she cooked on a regular basis; her chili mac comes immediately to mind. But, she always did and outstanding job of putting together a delicious Thanksgiving meal. Meals at my mother-in-law's table were always delicious, and her Thanksgiving meals were always outstanding. As newlyweds, we always ate two, yes two, Thanksgiving meals. My mother served Thanksgiving lunch and my mother-in-law served Thanksgiving dinner. So we would go to my parents for lunch, watch a little football with them, then later in the afternoon, we would pack up the kids and make the 45 minute drive to my in-laws house for dinner. No wonder I once weighed 300 pounds.

In recent years our Thanksgivings have changed drastically. My mother-in-law is in her eighties now and doesn't cook any more. My parents have both passed on and my siblings don't often get together for Thanksgiving. We all have kids of our own and have started our own traditions. You can read about our last Thanksgiving gathering here. I will admit that I feel a little bit guilty about not hosting a traditional Thanksgiving dinner to include my mother-in-law. But she has two grown daughters who have never hosted Thanksgiving or cooked the meal, so I've decided that I can deal with my own guilt. Bylinda will be picking Kay up from her group home and taking her out to lunch with them. As long as someone makes sure Kay is taken care of, I'm good.

My mother's Thanksgiving menu was set in stone and never, ever changed.

Mom with Nick circa 1986
Appetizers
  • Celery stuffed with pimento cheese (it had to be Price's pimento cheese, no substitutions allowed)
  • Deviled eggs
  • Cheese ball with assorted crackers
  • Crudite with Hidden Valley Ranch Party Dip
Meal
  • Roasted Turkey
  • Cornbread dressing (never stuffing)
  • Cranberry sauce (the jellied kind straight out of the can)
  • Green bean casserole
  • Broccoli and rice casserole
  • Sweet potatoes with marshmallows on top (the marshmallows were always burned to a crisp)
  • Giblet gravy (this was the one thing that was AWFUL, Mom just didn't do this well)
  • Fruit salad (always forgotten and left in the refrigerator until we were finished eating)
  • Dinner rolls
Desserts
  • Pumpkin pie
  • Pecan pie
  • Coconut pie
  • Chocolate pie
  • Chocolate cake with walnuts & raisins (not every year, but often)
Yes, that does look like a lot of food and it was. But keep in mind that my parents had six children. As we married and had kids of our own, it got to be quite a crowd. We needed a lot of food.

I remember my mom would get up very early and put the turkey in the oven. My dad, who always woke up early, would get us kids up early and whip us into a frenzy about watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade. He liked it as much as we did. Watching the parade with him is one of my sweetest memories. Meanwhile, Mom would slave all morning in the kitchen. Then we would all gather round the table and feast. After lunch there was football, the Aggies vs. Longhorns and the Dallas Cowboys.

As the years went by and our parents got older, Bylinda and I took over the cooking and hosting responsibilities. Bylinda's menu is even more impressive than the one listed above. My children would probably kill someone for her macaroni and cheese. She also adds ham and mashed potatoes to the menu.

The last time I hosted while Mother was still alive, I decided to try something a little different. We still had the usual roast turkey and dressing with all the usual sides. However, neither Grandad nor I really like the sweet potatoes with marshmallows, so I went looking for a different way to prepare them. I found a recipe from Chef Emeril Lagasse for Bourbon Mashed Sweet Potatoes.

I looked over the recipe ingredients and decided that it would work nicely. It had enough molasses that it would still be sweet, but not sticky with marshmallows on top. I wasn't really worried about the potatoes containing bourbon because I've always heard that the alcohol cooks off when you prepare food and two pounds of potatoes only has a quarter of a cup of bourbon.

I don't remember exactly who was at Thanksgiving that year. I think it was a mix of my family and Grandad's family. Grandad and Bylinda made the turkey and dressing and then we all worked on the sides.

It wasn't until Thanksgiving morning, as I was making my Bourbon Mashed Sweet Potatoes, that I realized that the bourbon was not cooked into the sweet potatoes. It was added during the final preparation stages so it was not cooked. But, by then it was too late. I was committed. When we served, Mom expressed disappointment at not having our traditionally prepared marshmallow sweet potatoes but she dug into the Bourbon Mashed Sweet Potatoes enthusiastically.

At this point, I should tell you that my mother was a teetotaler. Only once in my entire life did I ever see her take a drink. That was a pina colada at Red Lobster which she only took about two sips of before being giddy, giggly, dizzy, and visibly drunk. (And a lot more fun than usual.) After that she absolutely swore off of all liquor. She wouldn't even taste anything that had any small amount of liquor in it and she was kind of rude and condescending about it. I should also mention that we didn't tell her that the potatoes had bourbon in them.

Needless to say, Mom really liked the mashed potatoes. She liked them so much that she had seconds and then thirds. She liked them so much that she kept on eating them until they were all gone. She kept saying how good they were and eating more of them. Before long she was smiling happily and soon she was giggling. We never told her about the bourbon.

My friend Lisa over at Grandma's Briefs is hosting a Thanksgiving recipe exchange today. So, in the spirit of sharing, I'm sharing this recipe which came from Good Morning America. It's my secret weapon for making everyone enjoy Thanksgiving just a little more.

Emeril Lagasse's Bourbon Mashed Sweet Potatoes


1 3/4 to 2 pounds sweet potatoes
1 teaspoon olive oil
1/2 cup heavy cream
1/4 cup bourbon whiskey
3 tablespoons packed light brown sugar
2 tablespoons molasses
1/8 teaspoon salt

Preheat the oven to 425 degrees F.

Lightly rub the sweet potatoes with the olive oil. Place on a foil-lined baking sheet and bake until tender, about 45 minutes to 1 hour, depending upon their size. Remove from the oven and let sit until cool enough to handle.

Peel the sweet potatoes and transfer the flesh to a large bowl. Add the cream, bourbon, brown sugar, molasses, and salt, and beat on high speed with a hand-held mixer until smooth. Cover to keep warm until ready to serve.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

A Texas Redneck Thanksgiving

I want to tell you about our Thanksgiving. I know we've moved on and are well into the Christmas season, but I've been sick since about two weeks before Thanksgiving. Catching a cold is a job hazard of working in an elementary school. And just when I thought it was completely gone, a big cold front blew through on Thanksgiving Day. The Seguin and San Antonio area is notorious for mountain cedar allergies. Combine that with an allergic reaction to Bath and Body Works Wall Flowers in both my sister's and my daughter's homes and I was sick again. I think I'm finally over it.

My sister, Kay
I know I've told you about my sister Kay. She's my sister who's just older than me and she lives in a group home. Last summer she moved from Corpus Christi to a new home in Seguin. This makes her closer to our sister Bylinda. They spend a lot of time together and Bylinda is excellent at taking care of Kay's needs and serves as Kay's advocate. Living in a group home has been very good for Kay. It has it's challenges though. She has very little personal space and not much room for storage. This makes buying a gift for Kay extremely difficult.

Over the past several years, we've pretty much abandoned the idea of getting our extended families together for holidays. It's just gotten to be too hard and too much work. But, if you ask Kay what she wants for any gift, she always replies "I just want my whole family to be together."  That brings us to Thanksgiving this year. Bylinda agreed to host the family at her house. Of course, none of our other brothers and sisters was available. So, basically, Bylinda's family, my family, and Kay went to Bylinda's house for Thanksgiving.

A few weeks in advance, we planned our menu. Bylinda baked the turkey, made cornbread dressing, macaroni and cheese, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, gravy, pumpkin pie, buttermilk pie, assorted hors douevres and homemade rolls. Katy made apple pie and green beans. I made pecan pies, deviled eggs, broccoli rice casserole, and pumpkin fluff. Nick was supposed to bring a honey-baked ham.

There were ten of us for Thanksgiving dinner and we had enough food to feed at least 25 people. Nick did arrive at his sister's house on Wednesday evening with two five-pound honey-baked hams. However, he left them in her refrigerator when we went to Bylinda's house. Trust me when I tell you that he will never live it down. His cousin Zachary was not happy. He claimed that the promise of honey-baked ham was the main reason he came to Thanksgiving.

Our Little Princess "drives" the tractor
We ate to our hearts' (and stomachs') content. The men then migrated out to the "man room" for an afternoon of football while the women settled into the living room to visit and talk.

Bylinda and her husband Mack live out in the country. Their home is an old farm house that was built in the 1920's and restored by it's previous owners. It has high ceilings and is homey and cozy. Both of my kids absolutely adore Aunt B's house. Just recently they've recently added an out-building. The main part of this building is the "man room." It has a fully-stocked bar, a game table, a television, and storage for Mack's Harley. The other part is a sewing/craft/music room for Bylinda and a store room. In between these two areas is a garage where the tractor and gator are stored.

Uncle Mack giving instructions as we start our ride.
Let the Redneck festivities begin! After lunch, Our Little Princess discovered the tractor and the gator. She immediately climbed aboard and pretended to be driving. Mack asked if she wanted to ride and she confirmed that she did. Uncle Nick took the driver's seat on the gator. When the motor started, she was very reluctant to climb back on. It was too noisy for her. But after I got on, she agreed to sit on my lap for a ride.We took a couple of laps around the yard and she loved it.

Our Little Princess at Aunt B's keyboard.
Bylinda came out and gave us a tour of her newly completed sewing/craft/music room. It's really nice. She can now sew and craft to her heart's content and not have to worry about making a mess in the house or cleaning it up right in the middle of a project to make room for company. Our Little Princess really enjoyed playing the keyboard ... a lot.

After that the ladies went back into the house and the men stayed out in the man room. A few minutes later we heard the unmistakable sound of gunfire. That's right ... in the tradition of true Texas rednecks the menfolk had broken out the guns and were having target practice in the back pasture. My brother-in-law has an impressive collection of firearms ... everything from pistols to assault rifles ... and I'm pretty sure they fired them all. What? Y'all don't shoot guns and ride gators at Thanksgiving?

And where was Kay for this afternoon of family togetherness? Immediately after lunch, she, who wanted so much to have her family together, went into the front bedroom and napped the afternoon away. That's right! She slept through all the family time. Too funny!

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Friday Night Dinners

At our house we don't cook on Fridays ... and we never have. When Grams was working full time, by the time I got off work on Friday evening, I was usually fried. I just wanted a glass of wine and a chance to sit in a stupor and stare into space. Grandad was pretty much the same.

When we were raising kids, Friday nights were always busy. We would rush home from work, change clothes and head to the gym for a basketball game, to the stadium for a football game or track meet, or the soccer, baseball or kickball field. It was always some kind of season for one or the other of our kids. Often we just ate whatever was convenient.

Any Friday night when we weren't already occupied, we either went out to dinner ... often to McDonald's or Taco Bell because that's what we could afford ... or we would stop at the deli counter and buy cold cuts, cheese and crackers. Our kids particularly enjoyed these deli dinners because we would either take them to the park for a picnic or we would have a picnic in the living room.

The kids loved it when we had a picnic in the living room. I would take out a big quilt and spread it on the floor in front of the fireplace. Ham, turkey and cheese were cut into cracker-sized pieces and stacked on a plate which we all shared. We included baby carrots, pickles, and olives. Grandad and I would split a bottle of wine while the kids had Kool-aid or sparkling grape juice. We would rent a movie and watch it while we lounged over our dinner. These living room picnics are among our favorite memories. They kids still talk about them.

Grams and Grandad realized early the importance of a family dinner. We were very strict about dinners. Every day of the week except Friday, we sat down together as a family for dinner, always beginning our meal with grace. We were not flexible on dinner. Everyone came to the table and ate together every day of the week except Friday. The kids were never allowed to make their plates and sit in front of the television. Everyone sat at the table.

The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration reports that teens who don't have regular family dinners are more likely to abuse drugs. Girls who have regular family dinners are less likely to develop unhealthy eating habits including anorexia. They also report that parents who sit down for meals with their children on a regular basis are more connected with them and more involved with what is happening in their lives.

We were fortunate that we didn't have any major problems with either of our kids when they were teens. Neither of them gave us any big problems like drug abuse or running away. I always say that our kids were too busy to get into trouble. But, if these family dinners were part of the reason -- we got lucky. All I can say is "Who Knew?" I certainly had no idea that these were the possible effects of family dinners. I just knew it was important to slow down for a few minutes and spend a little time with each other.

I'm happy to report that our daughter started the tradition of daily family dinners with our little princess as soon as she could sit up in the high chair.

As our lives have evolved, so have our Friday night dinners. Now that we're empty nesters, we have a new Friday night tradition. Friday night is strictly reserved for dinner out with Grandad. Our Friday night dinners together are sacred. We don't make separate plans for Friday nights. Exceptions are extremely rare.

We have a group of neighbors who often join us. We've come to call ourselves the Friday Night Dinner Club. It's a very casual group. There are three couples who form the core group. One couple in their 40's, one in their 60's and Grandad and I are in our 50's. Since she moved into our neighborhood, Grandad's mother joins us every week and there are a few other couples and singles who sort of drift in and out of the group. It's very loosely defined, and it's a lot of fun. We have been known to drive up the coast 45 minutes to Rockport or go out to Padre Island for seafood. We take turns deciding where to go and our choices vary widely. The best thing about the Friday Night Dinner Club is how much fun we have. It's a great chance for neighbors to spend some time together and unwind at the end of the week.

This group of neighbors has proven to be a great support group. We share each other's lives and challenges. We laugh together and cry for each other. The 30+ year span of our ages is valuable. We are able to give each other advice and perspective from a variety of viewpoints. The Friday Night Dinner Club is a big part of the reason Grams Made It.